Sunday, June 27, 2010

(didn't get) to the church on time

as i try to get into a regular routine of this blogging thing, i suppose i'll have to let my grammar and content struggle and straggle until maybe, magic happens and once in a while, like my iphone and my computer, syncs up....

today, we didn't make it to church. my girls and I made it to teach class to five year olds. (because I LOVE teaching 5 year olds - they say things like "yesterday, when my dad took me to Hooters...") anyway, i'm wondering, is it awful if I don't go to church, yet teach? it's not as if i don't get anything out of church, it's just that today, i got SO much more out of sleeping. last week was 21 days crammed into 7...i needed sleep.

i wonder, am i sending the wrong message to my kids? is my faith lived out everyday or is it validated by the 30-45 minutes i might spend in congregated worship on sunday morning before i teach those Hooters-going five year olds?

i let little brother skip out of it all and stay home with dad - when we go just to teach, dad doesn't go to church by himself (i won't mention i've spent a lifetime hauling children to church and class by MYself...that's another blog).. what message does that give? i'm not sure, but i may have seen redemption later, through a tarantula...

you see, little man caught a tarantula last night (we have them all over) as it crawled towards the hot tub. he retrieved a plastic container (think cottage cheese size) and caught it. kept it all night. we have one caged tarantula - a Chilean rose hair appropriately named Rosie. Rosie has been with us for over 12 years - tarantulas live FOREVER. the new one couldn't go in her cage - they'd kill each other. and, I explained, Rosie was bred in captivity - her glass home is all she knows. this wild tarantula only knows the outside - his compassion took over. he decided to let the new spider on the block go back where it knew how to be a spider.

i liked his reasoning, i loved his compassion, and i admired the way he's learning to care for creatures ......however, he let it go right by the hot tub - on the patio of the pool. where it could run into me. again. because, he said that was where he found it and where the spider would know what to do. i would have to fend for myself if i got in the hot tub.

i think God does that for me sometimes. i get lost. i find myself where i don't know how to be me. i'm not sure how, but i open my eyes to once again find myself in familiar territory. maybe i get caught up in things i shouldn't. maybe i learn how to be me and find the familiar. i don't know. i think God just picks me up - trap and all - and gently shoos me out into a land of familiarity ...

no, i don't think missing church was all that big of a deal....but then again, who knows?

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